My anxiety levels have been at an all time high. I haven’t been feeling like myself but lately it has been getting worst. I can’t even put into words what the fuck has me feeling this way. Maybe it’s everything that I’ve vented up and held onto for too long. Maybe I need to scream everything I’m feeling on to deaf ears because no matter how much I talk they never seem to listen.

We often fall into false pretenses of what a relationship should be. A lot of our reality and what we believe in comes from our childhood. What we grew up seeing we think of as normal. Some people stay stuck believing what they’ve been conditioned to believe. It’s very rare that you find another human soul that believes the world is a magical place. A soul who believes in love as a feeling that is so powerful it can make non believers, believe. It’s something so much more, it’s a feeling you can’t explain, it’s something that is so much bigger than the blind eye can see.

Comfort

Sometimes we get too comfortable. The same old bad habits keep us tied down and we don’t grow into our full potential. We wait for the weekend to have fun. We wait for Monday to start eating healthy. We stay in dead end jobs because we fear the unknown. We leave for tomorrow what should be done today. Look around you are you fully satisfied and happy? If not what’s holding you back?

selfless

Are people selfless enough to let someone go. To let them be happy despite it being with someone else? 

To be continued

Trust

Coming from a family that frowned upon showing any kind of emotion because it somehow made you weak was hard for me when it came to opening up to anyone. Growing up I was the quiet girl more on the shy side until I really got to know a person. As an adult I’m equally as reserved. It takes me a very long time to feel comfortable enough to share personal things and when I do it’s limited. I don’t know if it’s pride, ego or maybe even child hood trauma that causes me to be so reserved. I have a handful of people that I consider people that I trust but how can I trust when every time I’ve put my whole trust into someone I’ve loved they somehow turned around and taught me why exactly it is that I shouldn’t?